Book Club Time Machine: A Great and Terrible Beauty

On being a witchy teenaged girl

I am a big proponent of re-reading books. I love to re-read. A book you’ve already read is like a favorite coffee shop or your best friend’s basement the year you were fifteen. It is a favorite vacation spot and a time machine. Rereading a book can reveal things you missed the first time around, little coves along the shore that you can bob around in and explore, tide pools teeming with detail you overlooked as you were barreling towards the conclusion. Rereading can also transport you back in time to the place and person you were when you first read it. You may not have read the book for twenty years, but suddenly by reading familiar passages you can remember the Michelle Branch song that was playing on your boombox the first time you read them, the way the armchair with the mis-matched upholstery scratched at the back of your knees as you sat with your legs dangling over the arm.

Over a year ago, when I started this substack, I talked about wanting to honor the girl I had been who loved Young Adult novels. I talked about the reflexive judgement that comes from consuming things primarily enjoyed by teenage girls. I talked about it, but largely did not accomplish my goal. I would mention a YA book from time to time in other posts, but didn’t dig in. This is my attempt to course correct. To get back on track.

In general, I would say I’m not a big fan of writing book reviews. I think of the 100 or so books I have logged on Goodreads, I’ve maybe written two reviews. I read the reviews, but I don’t write them. I leave a rating out of a 5-star scale and keep it pushing.

When a friend suggested I write book reviews for my substack, I was skeptical. He then went on to clarify that it wouldn’t need to be a formal book review- more of a snapshot in time of what was happening when I read the book. That intrigued me. Another friend went on to add that I could pull quotes from the books, that I could let them speak for themselves without having to do deep literary analysis. It’s a blog post, not an MFA thesis. Her input kept me from tumbling off the cliff of “dear God, I am not smart enough for this” and falling into a swirling vortex of imposter syndrome.

Thank you, Arlo and Audrey, for the idea, for the reassurance, and for the cold beverage you bought me when I was having a sensory meltdown in the food hall.  

To start, we’re going back in time in more ways than one.

Our first book is “A Great and Terrible Beauty” by Libba Bray.

Published: 2003

Year I First Read It: 2005 or 2006

How Old Was I When I Read It?: 14

Summary from the Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data: “After the suspicious death of her mother in 1895, sixteen-year-old Gemma returns to England, after many years in India, to attend a finishing school where she becomes aware of her magical powers and ability to see into the spirit world.”

***

I was in my ninth grade Earth Science class the first time I heard of this book. I took the class with my friends Rachel and Jackie. The three of us were working on a project one day, discussing anything but the actual project, and I mentioned a strange recurring dream I had been having. Jackie’s eyes went wide, and she turned to Rachel, saying “Oh my god! That sounds like a Gemma dream!”. I had no idea what she was talking about. I looked to Rachel, who nodded seriously, a secret smile curling across her face. They knew something I didn’t.

Jackie went on to tell me about a book called “A Great and Terrible Beauty”, about a sixteen-year-old girl in Victorian England who begins having strange visions and discovers magic and another world where she has power.

“I know you’re not going to read it,” Rachel said then. We had been friends for two years, and she knew I did not often listen to recommendations. “But you should.”

I bought the book that weekend, on a trip to Barnes and Noble with my mom. I bought it because I wanted to know if I, too, was magic.

In its pages, I did not find proof of my own magical power, but neither did I find proof of the opposite. It’s a story of a sixteen-year-old girl, and grief, and growing up feeling like being who you are is a wretched thing. It’s a story of a rigid society exerting its power on young women because they’re afraid of those young women. It’s a book that taught me that despite how powerless I felt, there would always be people who hated me for things I could not control, like my youth or my clever mind or my beauty or my choice. I’m not saying that this magic book about Victorian England made me into a feminist but I’m not saying it didn’t make me into a feminist.

Favorite Quotes:

“Felicity ignores us. She walks out to them, an apparition in white and blue velvet, her head held high as they stare in awe at her, the goddess. I don't know yet what power feels like. But this is surely what it looks like, and I think I'm beginning to understand why those ancient women had to hide in caves. Why our parents and suitors want us to behave properly and predictably. It's not that they want to protect us; it's that they fear us.” pg. 207

“What happens if your choice is misguided?' I ask, softly.
Miss Moore takes a pear from the bowl and offers us the grapes to devour. 'You must try to correct it.'
'But what if it’s too late? What if you can’t?'
There's a sad sympathy in Miss Moore's catlike eyes as she regards my painting again. She paints the thinnest sliver of shadow along the bottom of the apple, bringing it fully to life.
'Then you must find a way to live with it.” pg. 268

“A deer. She spies me and bolts through the trees. I run after her, not really giving chase. I’m running because I can, because I must. Because I want to see how far I can go before I have to stop.” pg. 303

Why You Should Read This Book:

If you like gothic novels, Mean Girls, enemies to lovers, folklore from a number of different cultures, jokes about the British, and so many damn corset metaphors, then I would heartily recommend “A Great and Terrible Beauty”.

I will warn you that the cover does look like it is a bodice ripper, so much so that while reading it before class in the ninth grade, a boy in my class asked me if I was reading porn. There is no porn in this book- it is Young Adult- but I will say that there is a kissing scene that I read over and over again as a teenager. I re-read it for this post- even as an adult it holds up.

This book is the first in a trilogy. I recommend those books, “Rebel Angels” and “The Sweet Far Thing” as well.

How You Should Read This Book:

Under the covers, in a lacy nightdress, with a candle sputtering on your bedside table. You should be drinking a cup of tea with a good helping of whiskey if you need courage. Don’t be scared when you hear a tapping on the window- it’s either the wind, or a mysterious young man with a warning.

Leave me a comment with your favorite books from high school! They can be Young Adult or otherwise- I would just love to know what you loved as a teenager. Maybe we have books in common and you might see a future post about your favorite teenaged read!

Thank you for reading! I know it has been a while. For those of you who are curious, I promise I have been writing this whole time, but I have been focusing mostly on my fiction writing. I have several essays in various states of completeness but I am trying to take my time with them, and be more discerning with what I choose to share and what I choose to let marinate.